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Chemistry Class

 
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HangDiver



Joined: 01 May 2008
Posts: 503
Location: Boulder

PostPosted: Thu Jul 22, 2010 10:05 am    Post subject: Chemistry Class Reply with quote

A chemistry professor put a bonus question on a midterm exam and one of his students answer to the question was so profound that he decided to share it.

Bonus question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat) ?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant. One student however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving, which is unlikely. I think we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are intering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today.

Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. Wwith birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives us two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls are entering Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will decrease until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Theresa during my Freshman year that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you", and take into account the fact that i slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corolllary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct..........leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Theresa kept shouting "Oh my God".

This student received an A+.
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jj



Joined: 18 Sep 2007
Posts: 333

PostPosted: Wed Jul 28, 2010 9:19 pm    Post subject: Re: Chemistry Class Reply with quote

HangDiver wrote:
This student received an A+.


From the chemistry professor or Theresa? Wink
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